Real Bread: Sourfaux

There’s a quiet scandal happening in Britain’s kitchens, cafés, and packed-lunch boxes — and it’s time to call it out. Everywhere you look, loaves are masquerading as “artisan”, “craft”, or, the one that gets me the most, “sourdough”. Except they’re not. They’re sourfaux: pumped-up pretenders, flogged as the real deal while hiding a cocktail of additives, improvers, fast-acting yeasts, and enough gums to tile a bathroom.

Real bread doesn’t need any of that.

Real bread is honest.

Real bread is slow.

Real bread is alive.

A true sourdough loaf starts with just three things: flour, water, and a living starter that’s been nurtured like a family pet that occasionally misbehaves. It bubbles, it grows, it sulks when ignored — but when it’s happy, it gives you a loaf with character. A loaf with structure. A loaf that stands up proudly when you slice it rather than folding over like a damp flannel.

Because let’s be honest: nothing ruins a good sandwich faster than flabby bread. That moment when you bite in and the whole thing compresses into a sad, doughy wedge… it’s enough to make a person question their life choices. British sandwiches deserve better. We deserve crunch, chew, texture — a platform strong enough to carry whatever you stack inside it.

My campaign for Real Bread is really a campaign for the perfect sandwich. And that starts at the foundation. If the bread collapses, the sandwich collapses. You can’t build a cottage on a marsh, and you can’t build a great sandwich on sourfaux.

So here’s to the rise of real bread.

To starters that live on the worktop.

To loaves with a proper crust.

To sandwiches with integrity.

Join me in the pursuit of the perfect sandwich. Let’s elevate British sandwich-making one honest loaf at a time.

If you’re reading this and thinking, “Right… I want in. I want to make proper bread, not this puffy pretend nonsense,” then you’re in luck. I’ve bottled up a bit of my own living starter — the same one powering my weekend baking marathons — and it’s now on the shelf in the farm shop. It’s lively, it’s reliable, and it’s ready to help you build sandwiches with actual backbone. Pick one up, take it home, give it a name if you want… and join me in my completely reasonable crusade against flabby bread.

SHOP STARTERS